THE EMPEROR

Thursday morning. "I" will not go out this morning. She has had a couple of cookies, followed me around. But she only stands at the door, ears straight up listening. I try leaning out the door listening too. Trying to hear whatever is causing her not to go out for her morning bathroom break. I hear nothing. So finally I am at the computer, she is here in the dining room watching me. I sure wish she would learn to talk.


I didn't get up until almost five. I stumbled through the dining room. I glanced down at the computer as I walked to the bathroom. A brown square sat right in the center of the screen. "Oh no," I thought. Somethings wrong with the computer. I went on to the bathroom, turned on the coffee, then sat staring at the screen. I hurriedly tried going to the "Missouri Lottery," site. Thinking maybe if I changed sites the brown square would go away. The other site came up. Still there was a brown square, right in the center. I bent down turned off the computer, as I waited for the computer to reboot I saw even with the computer off, there was still a brown square. My heart sank, he, the Emperor would get up and see his computer has a brown square in the center of the screen. I would be blamed. He calls himself the Emperor, you know the ruler of the land. I am smiling as I write this.

Anyway the Emperor I knew would be very unhappy. Sighing I reached out and touched the screen. The brown spot moved, it came off at my touch. Oh thank goodness the spot was a stick em note from the head man himself. After I knew the computer didn't have some strange virus that left a brown square on the computer screen, I laughed. But sometimes not seeing well is really not funny. I go to the bank every month, to cash my check. Most of the girls know me. They know I can't see the light colored writing on the back to see where to sign my name. They take my finger and lay it on the line. Without ever asking. But once in awhile there will a new girl. I have signed my check upside down before. I hate the look on someones face when they stick a paper under my nose and ask me to read it. I say I'm sorry, "I can't read." I know they look at me thinking, "Good grief that age and is still illiterate.

But I have many things to be thankful for. This morning I am thankful the brown square was only a stick em note. And really I should be totally grateful, for how many mortal people get to live with a real live Emperor. I do, so I know I am blessed. I kept asking him if he had ever heard the fairy tale of the Emperors new clothes. He hadn't, I told him. He was not amused. Later that day he came out of the bathroom in his bathrobe. I wondered why he had taken his clothes off and put on his bathrobe. He threw open the robe. "I;m the Emperor,' he hollered. "I stared at him in his birthday suit. "Well," I said as I stared at him, a big smile covering his face. "Do they give refunds, I think they left some wrinkles in the suit." he did not laugh. For one minute I had forgotten. Only Emperors are allowed to crack jokes. So that little episode ended with the Emperor demanding, "off with her head." Oh well I can out run him. Even if I am older. So for today I will wander out of here. Hopefully I can keep my mouth shut today and try not to hear the words, "Off with her head." See ya later, I'm outta here.